Tom Cruise took his hostages to Balthazar restaurant in NYC for brunch yesterday. Katie Holmes‘ parentals were there, as was Tom’s mom Mary Lee. Can you imagine the stilted conversation at that soiree.
Katie’s Dad: So, uh, Tom – are you following football this season?
Tom: Scientology has enabled me to embrace the superman within. I feel like I can do ANYTHING. ANYTHING! I could levitate these crepes with my mind right now if I wanted to.
Katie’s Mom: Well, that’s…wonderful. You must be so proud, Mary.
Mary Lee: (silent, tearful, terrified)
Suri Cruise: (to the waiter) Can you adopt me?
Click on any image in the gallery for 14 more pictures of the Cruises eatin’!
Tom Cruise took his hostages to Balthazar restaurant in NYC for brunch
yesterday. Katie Holmes’ parentals were there, as was Tom’s mom Mary
Lee. Can you imagine the stilted conversation at that soiree.
Katie’s Dad: So, uh, Tom – are you following football this season?
Tom: Scientology has enabled me to embrace the superman within. I feel
like I can do ANYTHING. ANYTHING! I could levitate these crepes with my
mind right now if I wanted to.
Katie’s Mom: Well, that’s…wonderful. You must be so proud, Mary.
Mary Lee: (silent, tearful, terrified)
Suri Cruise: (to the waiter) Can you adopt me?
Click on any image in the gallery for 14 more pictures of the Cruises eatin’!























Why does this kid never have tights or a coat on? The parents are always covered up.
Nothing Tom does anymore seems genuine. Even going out for lunch. Has to be a photo op with poor little Suri in tow. And don’t forget the awkward inlaws. Katie only looks happy when shes not with Tom. He needs to just stay in LA and pay all her shopping bills.
Katie (shaky voice) : I want a divorce.
Tom (shouting, jumps up on his chair) : What ? what? You wants hors d’oeuvres. No problemo sweetheart, you know you can eat whatever you want as long as you remain Size 2. Check
Clause 25 of the contract.
Tom’s mother : Prays silently while nervously crumbles bread.
Katie’s mother (vaguely) : Oh that’s nice dear….
Katie’s father : Suri, pass the wine.
Suri : Sorry the vino is vide dude. Waiter anothe Cab Sav when you’re ready
It looks more and more like Suri refuses to wear a coat. Maybe that’s why Tom’s been wrapping that white blanket around Suri lately.
What’s wrong with Katie’s feet? Has she completed the transformation into the Stepford Wife?
oh j harvey that’s a good one, thank you….!