Glamour Collision At The 'Today Show'

Look, they're young, beautiful and some of them are hiding their candy! Jesse McCartney, Katy Perry, and The (Trannycat) Pussycat Dolls all banded together to play at the Today Show's Summer Concert series in NYC this morning.

Katy Perry dressed as a damn watermelon. She's into some weird outfits. She's really into summer. Fill her full of vodka and let's drink!

Jesse McCartney is too short to pull off the Ratpack thing and the less said about these girls with something "extra" the better. When they grow up, they want boobies. And real vaginas.

Click any image to view all 15+ photos of Katy Perry, Jesse McCartney and the Pussycat Dolls on Today in the gallery!

Abercrombie & Fitch get political  [Towleroad]
The Empress Of Lucite Can Do Anything  [Dlisted]
Keeley Hazell Topless Pictures Go For Gold  [Egotastic]
Vicki B Releases Her 'Signature' Scent  [Pink is the New Blog]
The Big Gunn Points at Katie Holmes  [Bauer-Griffin Online]
Reese Witherspoon is Brazilian Breathless  [JustJared]
Naomi Campbell got hooked up  [Celebslam]
Blake Lively Forgets Her Pants  [Hollywood Tuna]
katy perry gets all mashed up!  [popbytes]
Tattoos at a Harley Festival  [Cityrag]
Rihanna and Chris Brown Can't Stop the Music  [Pacific Coast News Online]
Jody Marsh is a Lady  [IDLYITW]
Jack Black Can't Fart As Good As a Computer  [Hollywood Rag]

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Kelly Osbourne, still smarting from her kitchen cabinet having had enough and giving her a black eye, decided to take her revenge out on a gossip columnist.

Kelly was at the Punk nightclub in London, swilling champagne and dancing her cares away, when she spotted a reported who recently implied that her lesbionic boyfriend Luke Worrell was a pinhead.

Kelly rolled up on her ass, yelled at her and punctuated her words with a slap to the face. Bizzapp!

Osbourne then quickly fled the scene with a pal, and probably went home to give the same slap to her kitchen cabinet. Bitch, the cabinet just had enough of your pudgy little fingers invading it every five minutes and had to stop the madness.

Click any photo to view all 10+ photos of Kelly Osbourne in the gallery!

-Madonna was spotted at Schoenefeld airport in her damn robe. This is the new trend - rich people rolling up out on the streets in whatever they want. We just didn't think Madonna was gonna turn 50 and just drop all pretense of glamour. Sad.

-Michael Phelps and Carrie Underwood are allegedly planning a date. She got word to him that she thought he was "cute." The medals, maybe. No offense. I know he's Jesus in the pool, but there's something a little World's Tallest Man face about him.

-Heidi Montag's candidate John McCain has picked his running mate. He's settled on Alaskan governor (?!?) Sarah Palin as his Republican vice presidential candidate. She was in a beauty pageant one time. Good luck, Johnny.

Check out all the photos of Madonna in the gallery.

I think I'm going to heave. Jessica Simpson claims that when she farts, it smells like a rose garden and not like the numerous douchebags she's had up there. I would rather see elderly people explore fisting than hear about what's coming out of her ass.

The mouthy bitch gave a country concert in Niagra Falls, and one reviewer claimed all this dumb bitch does is talk, and talk, and talk. About every single song. A pox on her and her family. Well, not Ashlee's gay emo baby. The innocent shouldn't have to suffer.

"I do pass gas a lot," she says. "I guarantee it smells like roses," was one of the many fabulous facts about herself she offered.

Here she is looking tried and fried as she returns to her hotel in NYC after filming a commercial for Macy's. I hope she got her ass caught in that tired wooden escalator that cuts off kids' hands!

Simpson also referred to ex-husband Nick Lachey's cheating, and claimed she almost quit singing after she screwed up the lyrics to "9 to 5" at a Dolly Parton tribute several years ago. Why did you come back? Damn! Dolly hates you like the rest of us do!

Check out all the photos of Jessica Simpson in the gallery.

Ugh, tanorexic buildup! Car crash survivor Victoria Beckham made an appearance at her perfume launch with her ears still clotted with fake tanner. Someone get this one a Q-Tip or a facecloth! Oh, the filth!

This can't be happening. How could they let her fly away from her alien homeworld without showing her the holotape of how the real humans she was set to impersonate spread out the bronzer so it doesn't look like they've been crawling through a dirty stable.

Click any image to view all 10+ photos of Victoria Beckham in the gallery!

Barack Obama is holding court at the Democratic National Convention in Denver, and half of Hollywood has joined him to get liberal with it for CHANGE! Yeah, I know John McCain picked some ex-beauty queen as his vice, but that was such a ploy to get the female/sensitive ponytail vote. When's the last time YOU saw Geraldine Ferraro anywhere, huh?

Jessica Alba is there, clouding Denver with her cranky stank! Rosario Dawson! Fergie! Sheryl Crow! Old hottie Susan Sarandon! Jamie Foxx! I wouldn't brag about that one.

It's bad, though, that I mainly tune into the DNC to see what Michelle Obama's wearing, huh? I'm really all about the issues.



Featured in the gallery: Rosario Dawson, will.i.am, Matthew Modine, Stevie Wonder, Susan Sarandon, Jessica Alba, Kerry Washington, Lily Cole, Sheryl Crow, John Legend, Fergie, Chevy Chase, Jamie Foxx, Melissa Etheridge and Spike Lee.

Click any image to view all 35+ photos of the celebrities, plus Barack Obama, attending the Democratic Convention in the gallery!

Dammmn, girl. Selena Gomez is heating up -- and I don't mean in that tarty Miley Cyrus way. She just released her new music video for her song, "Tell Me Something I Don't Know," and shoot me, but I'm kind of digging it.



People keep saying that in the video she is just dancing with a mop (true) but somehow she channels a brunette Gwen Stefani as cinderella and it works for me. Lisa Timmons may hate me now, but I have to side with Team Selena because when her song gets big it won't annoy me, at least for a little while.

See more photos of Selena Gomez and her clumsy bff Demi Lovato in Teen Magazine by clicking on any image.

Click the photo above to find out who the beach blond is after the jump.

Sorry about the monier. An attempt at a little joke too early in the morning.

Did you catch Dirty Sexy Money last season? If not, you missed some of the most interesting (and far fetched) and fun family scenarios shown on network television. With Lucy Liu joining the show this fall, things will only get more delicious.



The Darlings of New York City, so absurdly wealthy they put the "upper" in Upper East Side. This preeminent family's five spoiled adult brats - one of them a Presidential candidate - are always getting mixed up with the wrong people, including freeloading spouses, illegal immigrants and transvestite characters. It will take a miracle to keep this Kennedy-esque clan out of the tabloids - and out of jail. Actually, they're less fucked up than many families that I know.

Dirty Sexy Money is back this coming October 1st on ABC.

Featured in the gallery: Peter Krause, Donald Sutherland, William Baldwin, Natalie Zea,
Seth Gabel, Jill Clayburgh, Glenn Fitzgerald, Lucy Liu, Zoe McLellan and Blair Underwood.

Click any photo to view all 15+ photos of the Dirty Sexy Money cast in the gallery!