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She can’t even steer the damn things. Shoes shouldn’t have to come with an IQ test! Here’s Jessica Simpson arriving in Los Angles with her sister Ashlee. Ashlee’s knocked up by a gay.

Jessica recently went country, and by “went country” I mean – switched up her genre in a desperate move to keep the checks a’comin. Anyway, another chick who did that is Jewel. Remember when Jewel went dance-pop for two seconds? That was awesome, and such a bad left turn. In fact, it was a left turn through a guard rail and crashing onto the jagged rocks below and exploding into shrapnel. Anyway, Jewel is country now and has advice for Jessica’s stupid ass. Start a column, Jewel.

“I really like Jessica. She’s always been such a sweet, sweet person.
If I were going to give her any advice, I would say work hard and be
authentic. Be true to who you are,” Jewel said from her van. Which she had to go back to living in.

Authentic? HAH! If this country thing fails, bitch is going to cut a hip-hop demo with Swizz Beatz and popping off on people while booty clapping for the masses! With corn-rows in!

Click any of the photos to view the entire gallery of 33 photos of Jessica Simpson with her little dog Daisy and her sister Ashlee Simpson.

Jessica recently went country,
and by “went country” I mean – switched up her genre in a desperate
move to keep the checks a’comin. Anyway, another chick who did that is
Jewel. Remember when Jewel went dance-pop for two seconds? That was
awesome, and such a bad left turn. In fact, it was a left turn through
a guard rail and crashing onto the jagged rocks below and exploding
into shrapnel. Anyway, Jewel is country now and has advice for Jessica’s stupid ass. Start a column, Jewel.”I really like Jessica. She’s always been such a sweet, sweet person.
If I were going to give her any advice, I would say work hard and be
authentic. Be true to who you are,” Jewel said from her van. Which she had to go back to living in.Authentic?
HAH! If this country thing fails, bitch is going to cut a hip-hop demo
with Swizz Beatz and popping off on people while booty clapping for the
masses! With corn-rows in!Check out all the photos to view the entire gallery of 33 photos of Jessica Simpson with her little dog Daisy and her sister Ashlee Simpson.