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Pornography martyrs Joe Francis and Larry Flynt are complaining that tough economic times are causing men to spend less money jerking off. This is heartbreaking (and sort of hard to believe).

So naturally, it’s time to make a trip to Washington and ask Congress to help “rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America” with a $5 billion porn bailout plan.

In fact, Joe Francis thinks it’s downright miserly that Congress would consider all sorts of other bailouts and just leave the porn industry out in the cold. It’s completely inhumane and cold-hearted. What’s a healthy society without cum shots?

“Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration,” he said.

Nice. Here’s hoping for government-mandated pornography in every American household by 2010.

View a gallery of Joe Francis and Larry Flynt here!

Pornography martyrs Joe Francis and Larry Flynt are complaining that tough economic times are causing men to spend less money jerking off. This is heartbreaking (and sort of hard to believe).

So naturally, it’s time to make a trip to Washington and ask Congress
to help “rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America” with a $5 billion
porn bailout plan.

In fact, Joe Francis thinks it’s downright miserly that Congress would consider all sorts of other bailouts and just leave the porn industry out in the cold. It’s completely inhumane and cold-hearted. What’s a healthy society without cum shots?

“Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important
businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration,” he said.

Nice. Here’s hoping for government-mandated pornography in every American household by 2010.

View a gallery of Joe Francis and Larry Flynt!