There’s two things my mother always told me about aging and hairstyles:

1. Don’t cut your hair too short, you’ll look like a boy.

2. NEVER, ever, ever wear your hair all the way back because you’ll just look old!

Granted, I take most of her advice with a grain of salt. But at tonight’s SAG Awards, I’d have to agree.

Although Julia Louis Dreyfus has a rock-hard figure at the age of 49 that would bring the rest of us shame in our twenties, that hairstyle is aging you darling.

And even though I want to devour most Dolce & Gabbana dresses I see at the store, I can’t say I’m a fan of this choice. The cut is too low and tight, the sheer is playing mind-games with my eyes and the confusion between vertical and horizontal shaping is all wrong!

Hopefully, the Shrine Exposition Center has dim lighting and lots of alcohol, because this dress and that grandma hair are getting you closer and closer to the fashion disaster list.