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Page Six reports that Lohan acted a fool at the GQ Awards, once again enabled by her coat-tail riding momma. There is a lot of hotness in this one, so allow me to interject my snark several times. Consider me your color commentator.

DESPITE attending “several” Alcoholics Anonymous meetings this week, Lindsay Lohan drank champagne and made a big scene at the GQ Men of the Year dinner – all under the watchful eye of her hard-partying mom-ager, Dina Lohan.

When the Lohans arrived at the exclusive dinner at the Sunset Tower – joining the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio, Al Gore, Jay-Z, Jennifer Connelly and Magic Johnson – she “flipped out” upon seeing Jessica Biel, the luminous star of “The Illusionist,” there with her assistant.

Biel’s assistant used to work for Lohan and earned the “Mean Girls” star’s ire when she quit several months ago.

According to a witness, Lohan started screaming, “If she stays, I’m outta here! I can’t look at that girl! I can’t believe you would allow an assistant in here – she doesn’t belong in here!”

“It was really uncalled for,” said our spy. “Jessica and everyone else ignored her.”

Not only is Lindsay a cocaine and booze fueled fiery twisted metal bodies everywhere train wreck, she’s also a snob.

No, wait. There’s more! After the jump (including photos!).

A rep for Lohan said, “This does not sound like Lindsay.”

Has the rep MET Lindsay? Or is Lindsay sending another actress to meetings in her place, perhaps in a Lindsay Lohan wig and clutching a bottle of Jack Daniels…

A Biel friend said, “Jess didn’t steal anyone’s assistant – her assistant stopped working for Lindsay a long time ago. And whatever drama happened, Jess was no part of it. She is not part of [Lohan's] crowd – she is a professional.” A rep for Biel declined comment.

Jessica Biel’s friends sound straight up. Nice. Now I’m not so mad at her for ruining 7th Heaven.

Lohan was shunned at the glittering affair by other celebs who are tired of her bratty antics and bad work ethic. Overhearing her tirade about Biel’s assistant, Will Ferrell turned to DiCaprio, Gore and Affleck and said, “Who cares about that freak anymore, anyway?” – setting off laughter. Later, Lohan, with a champagne glass in her hand, tried flirting with Leo, to no avail.

That sounds a little teenage girl catty for a grown man like Will Ferrell to say, but if he was imitating her when he said it – that’s hot.

Leo musta been like “honey, my last girlfriend was Gisele Bundchen. You show off your vagina in front of clubs for attention. Move along.”

When “Jackass” star Johnny Knoxville arrived later in the evening, Lohan lit up and the two began nuzzling and necking – until Lohan’s ex, Harry Morton, appeared.

Johnny, Johnny, Johnny. I had developed some respect for you when I read that you were into gay “bears”. But then Jessica Simpson and now Lohan? I’d take a cheese grater to my pin if I were you. It’s the only way your sexual karma will ever be leveled out again.

“Harry had been called by Lindsay, and he arrived with a bunch of her friends, and then they all left together, including Johnny. It was weird,” said a source. “Dina did a lousy job of reining in her daughter, and it looked like she just used Lindsay to get into the party in the first place.”

Seriously, people are there for awards and there’s this mother and daughter blowjob team staggering about, yelling things and trying to make out with everyone in the room. Talk about bringing the level of sophistication down.

I know she was in that issue of GQ, and she said some sorta witty things. But by now they must have realized that she used a ghost-writer.

(Image source)