Mary-Kate Olsen Should Wear Those To Rehab

July 9th, 2008 // 9 Comments

Mary-Kate Trollsen (I love that) might be off to rehab again. Star is saying that the little fashionista creepy-crawly is binge-drinking and partying and not giving an eff. She’s a millionaire. I wouldn’t give an eff either. I would be sitting around my house all day, naked and snorting peppermint schnapps while watching Empire Records and making beefy frat boys in serious need of money do sweaty calisthenics in short-shorts.

“Mary-Kate seriously needs to get to rehab, but she doesn’t think she
has a problem,” says a source. “She thinks she’s young, hip and
entitled to live her life as she sees fit. But it’s affecting
everything.”

Oh, she’s hip, is she? Who says that? I looked TOTALLY hip in those gaucho pants.

Trollsen allegedly got so f*cked up that she took a digger in a public parking lot, and went to some holistic health spa to dry out. That didn’t take, because apparently she’s going for the sequel.

All I know is, I want those sunglasses.

Click any photo to view all the photos in the gallery!


Mary-Kate Trollsen (I love that) might be off to rehab again. Star
is saying that the little fashionista creepy-crawly is binge-drinking
and partying and not giving an eff. She’s a millionaire. I wouldn’t
give an eff either. I would be sitting around my house all day, naked
and snorting peppermint schnapps while watching Empire Records and making beefy frat boys in serious need of money do sweaty calisthenics in short-shorts.”Mary-Kate seriously needs to get to rehab, but she doesn’t think she
has a problem,” says a source. “She thinks she’s young, hip and
entitled to live her life as she sees fit. But it’s affecting
everything.”Oh, she’s hip, is she? Who says that? I looked TOTALLY hip in those gaucho pants.Trollsen
allegedly got so f*cked up that she took a digger in a public parking
lot, and went to some holistic health spa to dry out. That
didn’t take, because apparently she’s going for the sequel.All I know is, I want those sunglasses.

By J. Harvey

  1. Snow Pie

    Dump the perverted geriatric Jew glasses, they look stupid, especially combined with the overbloated plastic fish lips.

    She looks like a wannabe Jew film producer. If she wants to be that, then she has to demand that all films be made showing a lot of bare breasts and preferably with some total douchebag sucking on them and licking them wildly. Jew producers like that because Jews are ugly short and stupid whores who’ll do anything for money including eating their own children. It’s called promised land-thinking.

  2. Eskimo Pie

    Perhaps you should disallow hate postings – those comments are unacceptable.

  3. Giorgio

    i believe that the glasses she’s wearing on the cover are chanel spring/summer 07 :-)

  4. justine

    Damn the man, save the empire

  5. snow pie needs to get laid

    snow pie, do us all a favor and cut your wrists, OK?

  6. AB

    Hey J. Harvey – were you dining on Boston’s Waterfront with a female companion this past Sunday? If you were, I think I might have been your server. Couldn’t believe it when the credit card said “J Harvey.”I remember the 2 of you being pretty cool. if it was you, I hope you had a good time.

  7. J. Harvey

    Hey AB – no, that wasn’t me. I was out of town. But if you have the credit card #, I will totally use it. What restaurant?

  8. J. Harvey

    Hey AB – no, that wasn’t me. I was out of town. But if you have the credit card #, I will totally use it. What restaurant?

  9. DN

    I totally do not get this chick. She and her sister were ugly little kids and now their wierd looking adults. She reminds me of cousin It.

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