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Is anyone surprised this little faux romance ended with a criminal charge? TMZ reports that Michael Lohan has been charged with 2nd degree harassment for allegedly attacking his fiancee Kate Major earlier this week.

Did she diss Michael’s parenting skills? Call Lindsay jailbait? Apparently not. Here’s how it went down:

“My fiance Michael Lohan came home while I was sleeping in a sofa chair. He woke me up, yelling, ‘Why didn’t you pick up your cell phone, you stupid c**t.’”

Kate, seen here with Michael at TMZ back in April, continues, “He then turned over the chair while I was still in it, tossing me to the floor. I crawled to the other side of the room to get away from him. He walked over to me, took his shoe off and kicked me in my face while I was still on the ground. He stood over me and said, ‘I’m going to go back to jail cause of you, cause I will kill you.’”

Kate says, “He said all of this to me cause he is afraid I’m going to leave him. I am very afraid of him.”

So in other words, he’s a low rent Mel Gibson.