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Every time I hear Keith Urban’s name, I picture him wearing a cowboy outfit and spurs, while spittin’ into a spittoon.  But then I actually see pictures of him and he has the nerve to disappoint me and wear a not so special blue plaid suit.  With his shirt unbuttoned to his belly button. Meh.

Then every time I hear Nicole Kidman’s name, I picture her veiled in nothing but sheer gossamer, like the Diva Plavalaguna, from ‘The Fifth Element’ (my fav movie people). Only white. And when I see her, it is painfully clear how she must have invaded Dracula’s lair and made a pantsuit from his curtains, and little gloves from his underpants. So granny-ish.  Double meh.

Check out all of our 2010 People’s Choice Awards coverage here!