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“I want to thank the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department and staff of the Century Regional Detention Center for treating me fairly and professionally. I am going to serve the remaining 40 days of my sentence. I have learned a great deal from this ordeal and hope that others have learned from my mistakes.”
I’m sure you have sweetie.
(via TMZ)
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mama | June 7, 2007 at 7:10 pm
i learned that if you are poor you serve your time in Jail, and that if you are Paris Hilton you serve time in a mansion. can’t say i’m too impressed with our legal system….
dezboy | June 7, 2007 at 7:22 pm
Anybody still wonder why racial minorities (hispanics, blacks) have about 100 discrimintation law suits against L.A.P.D. and the rest of the starstruck L.A. “justice” system????? Justice for just us white folks.
I’ll bet my left ‘nad this sorry azz beeyotch can’t even go 40 days in the crib. She will get high and go out. We have a pool at work betting how many days b4 her azz is photo’d going out.
toby | June 7, 2007 at 7:39 pm
It was cold turkey from the drugs… Guarantee they had to let Paris out because of drug detoxing. The rash is just a symptom. She has spent years honking down large quantities of booze and coke. Go to jail = go cold turkey. And the hours she lasted in the pokey also coincides with how long it takes for all the last of the chemicals to leave your body… which can manifest as a rash to accompany the vomiting and shakes.
The City attorney needs your help! | June 7, 2007 at 8:05 pm
IF YOU ARE A CELEBRITY WHO SUPPORTS THE CITY ATTORNEY PLEASE VOICE YOUR OPINION!, HE NEEDS YOUR HELP NOW IN BRINGING JUSTICE TO THIS CASE. PLEASE MAKE PUBLIC STATEMENTS TO THE MEDIA SUPPORTING THE CITY ATTORNEY, OTHERWISE HE WILL BE ALL ALONE IN THIS CRUSADE.
Chaz | June 7, 2007 at 8:54 pm
Supposedly the “health issue” that prompted her release was a low sperm count.
I have a feeling this new “I should get out of jail because I don’t like it” rationale isn’t going to work as well for the non-Hilton segment of society.
-A | June 7, 2007 at 8:58 pm
You know given Hilton’s stint in the pokey, this is actually pretty funny. No one expected her to last more than a day, so she proved everyone wrong by lasting four days. And come on. We all know that those with a little spending cash don’t follow the same rules we normal income people do. That’s why they have the VIP section of everything. Paris got the special treatment du jour and the legal system is going to be apologizing and trying to cover their ass for a looooooooooong time.
me | June 7, 2007 at 9:06 pm
so basically, she got grounded.
tammyv | June 7, 2007 at 9:13 pm
AND NOW THE JUDGE SPEAKS!
LOS ANGELES, June 6, 2007 – Hours after Paris Hilton was sent home under house arrest Thursday, the judge who put her in jail ordered her into court to determine whether she should be put back behind bars.
Hilton must report to court at 9 a.m. Friday, Superior Court spokesman Allan Parachini said late Thursday afternoon.
Write The Governor | June 7, 2007 at 9:29 pm
Dear Governor:
I am strongly against the release of Paris Hilton from jail. If it had been anyone else – the normal people – we would have spent the “whole” time in jail. Since she is rich, she gets treated like a queen. Money really does buy special attention.
I would strongly suggest that an investigation be done to see “who” in the L.A. County Sheriff’s office was paid-off. And investigate anyone else that is involved. This is sending a real bad message to drunk drivers and all the children and people that have been killed by drunk/drug related accidents and deaths.
She contributes nothing to society but sleaze, then is treated as if she is special. It now seems as if it does not matter to law enforcement if she had killed someone by her actions. The law should apply to everyone in the same manner so justice is fair and “just”. That is what it means.
I have never in my life cried about something like this. I feel so frustrated and let down by the legal system. She needs to spend the time she was supposed to spend in jail. She should be put back in and made to pay for her actions of breaking the law. She broke it more then once.
Drug addicts and drunk drivers will now think they can do what they want and the law will not punish them as it should. Please be a true Governor of this State and make us proud of you. I really do believe in your ability to make this a great state. The State I was born in and love. Thank you.
Loob | June 7, 2007 at 9:49 pm
AAHAHA! How funny will it be, if she gets thrown right back in there where she belongs?
I think the person responsible for letting her out should be fired, as they acted in contempt of the court’s ruling.
And if we check their bank balance, I’m fairly sure they will have received a whopping great *Gift* recently.
Receiving a payoff like that is probably a jailable offence too.
Linda B | June 7, 2007 at 10:02 pm
She is going back to court tomorrow morning…and maybe just maybe back to the slammer. She has become so frikken annoying (yes even more so) you kind of wish they would lock her up and forget about her. Poor baby.
Lilac | June 7, 2007 at 10:56 pm
This sentence fiasco flies in the face of Superior Court Judge Sauer explicitly noting in his order that there would be no electronic monitoring and/or home stay permitted for Paris Hilton’s sentence.
She’s probably at home right now sipping martinis, getting a pedicure and laughing with her friends about how she beat her rap.
Great precedent setting on the part of the sheriff’s department/ justice system.
White, rich & free.
Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, National Affairs Desk | June 8, 2007 at 12:14 am
Res Ipsa Loquitor: Paris Hilton and the Dirty Deal
“The scum always rises.”
-Richard M. Nixon
Paris Hilton lay on her steel bed, quivering and shivering. She had the shakes, bad. Her herpes had erupted in a bad, pestilent rash all over her thighs. Her withdrawal symptoms were bad and getting worse. She recognized the feeling. Bad flu symptoms and the herpes eruption. She knew that soon the bile would begin to rise. She thought she saw flying wombats coming at her from the window on the door of her cell.
Nice thoughts, nice thoughts. She tried to concentrate. A big, fat turgid penis entering her valtrex vagina. Fat cocaine rails lining the top of the steel toilet in her cell. Paul Allen floating her a thousand dollar bill for a blowjob.
It wasnt’t working. Her thighs itched uncontrollably. She’d scratched the herpes eruptions until they bled, and still the damn things itched. She’s ducked off everyone from the arresting officer to the guards to the trusty, and nothing had worked. Daddy had to come through this time.
“Behind every great fortune lies crime.”
-Voltaire
Rick Hilton paced his family room, impatiently. He knew there had to be a way to spring Paris. He just hadn’t thought of it yet. Kathy had sucked him off three times that morning, and yet no inspiration. He was stupid, but he knew how money worked. There was always someone to bribe to get what you wanted. It was, he thought, the American way.
He grew angry when he thought of Howard Weitzman. Asshole was supposed to be the best connected lawyer in LA, he thought, and all I got for his 250K fee was a limo ride to court. Bastard didn’t even know how to bribe someone in the DMV so that Paris could keep her license after her DUI. It’s all his thought, Rick thought. Goddamn Jew lawyer. Maybe the new Jew lawyer will come through, mused Rick.
The phone rang. Rick answered it. Answered prayers. The deal would go down tonight. He had the cash for the Sheriff. Paris knew what she had to do.
“I only get my rocks off when I’m dreaming…”
Jagger/Richards
Lee Baca, LA County Sheriff, slapped some Old Spice on his testicles. He thought he was dreaming. Yesterday, he was a middle aged lump taking bribes to take care of traffic tickets in order to fund his divorce and gambling debts. Tonight, he was going to take in a hundred grand in cash. And Paris Hilton was going to suck his cock. He wanted his testicles to smell nice for her. He slapped some more Old Spice on his balls.
He put on his trousers and started out the door. Suddenly, he stopped. Cunt has herpes, he thought. Better bring a condom. Looking into his wallet, he realized that his wallet condom had been in there so long that it had left a ring on the outside of his wallet. Got to stop at a convenience store to get a rubber, he thought.
“To live like an outlaw, you have to be honest.”
-Unknown outlaw biker
Rocky Delgadillo, LA City Attorney, put the phone down, and smacked his lips. Baca was going to spring Paris Hilton, he thought, and the dumbass wasn’t going to share the love. He smiled. I’m gonna fuck him up bad, he thought. He picked up the telephone and called Judge Sauer.
“I shot the sheriff…”
Bob Marley
Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer slammed the phone down. Goddamn it, he screamed. He kicked the wall. He was sick of this shit. Everytime some celebrity punk got caught driving drunk, he tried to punish him as if he was Mr. John Q. Public. And every goddamn time he did, that fucking sheriff took a bribe and let the celebrity go. And the asshole never spread the wealth, either.
This time was going to be different, Sauer thought. Delgadillo was a shitty lawyer, but he was fucking ambitious. Since he was a shitty lawyer, Sauer was going to have to write the papers that Deladillo had to file with his court as soon as possible after Paris Hilton was sprung. But Delgadillo is a sneaky shit, thought Sauer. And all he has to do is file them. Sauer smiled. This time, I’m going to fuck Baca up.
Jamie | June 8, 2007 at 12:20 am
I am praying that the backlash to releasing this ridiculously entitled jack-ass of a woman continues to grow. This is such a slap in the face to our justic system and to all the other less fortunate individuals who who aren’t the right color or born in the elite, monied class that obviously can buy their way out of any situation. I’m outraged! The MEDIA greatly contributes to these mediocore celebrities getting more than their 15 minutes of fame………but, it’s also the public who help fan the flame. It time for us to stop doing this. People of her ilk are trasy and having a very negative effect on our children!
Rob | June 8, 2007 at 12:27 am
Lock up the officials that let this happen. Let Paris stay at home.
Mel | June 8, 2007 at 6:00 am
Moral of the story: Be loaded, beautiful and famous, or wait your ass out in prison.
I am simply anticipating how this one spoilt brat will dig her way out this holy mess.
Law Student | June 8, 2007 at 9:15 am
To “Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, National Affairs Desk”: What does Res Ipsa Loquitor have to do with this situation? That is a latin term meaning “the thing speaks for itself”. It is used in tort cases to create an inference of negligence when there is no direct evidence of the defendant’s conduct. Sort of like when a scalpel is left behind in a patient’s abdomen after an operation — that’s an accident that doesn’t occur unless someone is negligent.
sassyne | June 8, 2007 at 9:46 am
I hope her herpes is in FULL BLOWN outbreak. I hope it spreads all over her body.
rdiggity1 | June 8, 2007 at 7:27 pm
Law Student, I’m not sure but I do believe Paris getting out early was obvious evidence of somebody’s greased palm. ril
elaine | June 10, 2007 at 4:40 pm
90210 Where the stars wear the STRIPES
http://www.cafepress.com/cp/store.aspx?s=artdavinci.3116178