View the Gallery / 4 Photos »

Pete Wentz needs to stop looking like Emily the Strange underwent FTM surgery. He recently broke a bone at a concert in Nawlins, leaping off a platform or something. If you want to see how gross it actually looks, click here. That’s nasty. I broke my foot like that once. I was white water rafting and I am a suburb not a country mouse. No one told me a rogue wave will come out of nowhere and knock you around while you have your damn foot braced so you don’t fall forward. And I froze up, and my foot snapped. Yeah. Snapped. And that’s the exact moment when we hit some intense rapids. So picture it – your first broken bone and you want to puke and you’re turning white and then you hit rapids and bitches start flying out of the boat. It was like “The Perfect Storm” but with a useless homo. Let me tell you, for the rest of the trip I sat in the middle of that boat and made like it was Cleopatra’s damn barge.

In a post titled, “I’ve got good news and bad news, which do you want to hear first?”, Wentz says: “For anyone who was at the voodoo fest in new orleans – you got to see me jump around. ended up breaking the bone that connects my shin to my foot. no shows will be canceled. i am currently trying to get a ‘rocker’ boot so i can have a walking cast. currently my foot is the size of a small car. if you see me at a show come sign my cast.”

Like Ashlee will let any bitches in halter tops near his damn cast. She will be planting her Botox face directly in the flight path of any Sharpie-wielding chickenheads. Trust me.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin Online