(WENN)

If it seems like R. Kelly’s life has remained pretty much “business as usual” since child pornography charges were placed on him five years ago, that’s because it really has. Since that time, Kelly has enjoyed an extremely successful time in his recording career, including three concert tours across the U.S. as well as six best-selling albums. In a tale about as complex and confusing as the “storyline” for his R&B opera, “Trapped in the Closet,” Kelly’s trial has been postponed by such strange occurrences as a case of appendicitis, as well as a judge falling off a ladder. The latest in this saga is an upcoming courtroom appearance scheduled for the rapper in Chicago on Friday for a status hearing, however, as of yet, no trial date has been set.

“Five years is a long time,” said Michael Helfand, a Chicago attorney with no links to Kelly’s case. “Most child pornography cases find themselves in a courtroom within a year or two.”

Hefland also speculates that the series of pushed-back court dates may actually work in Kelly’s favor.

“You may have a jury that’s going to come in and say, ‘So this happened in the 1990s and this is 2007? I’m just not buying it,”‘ Helfand said.

I think the only fair way to settle this is to have Mr. Biggs sitting in as judge and jury. And I don’t mean this guy, although that might be fun too.