Ralph Fiennes Into Flight Attendants

February 16th, 2007 // 11 Comments

By now, you’ve heard the story about Ralph Fiennes (pronounced “Rafe”, damnit!) luring the flight attendant into the bathroom and sticking it in six ways til’ Sunday . Because nothing is sexier than getting bent over a chemical toilet in a space so small that you can feel his John Thomas tickling your uvula and he didn’t enter through your mouth. What you might not know is that, despite the fact that they got caught and she got fired, she was so enamored of his sexual prowess that they kept up their jungle f*cking til’ the break o’ dawn. Let me lick you up and down, til you say stop! Let me play with yo body, baby, make you real hot!

Fienne’s long time girlfriend Sirin Lewenden has ended her five-month relationship with him because of his wandering eyes and hips. Robertson went on to add that the passion didn’t stop when the airplane hit the end of the runway. Miss Robertson claims they went on to share a passionate night in a Mumbai hotel – at the star’s invitation. After the plane landed in Mumbai shortly after 7pm local time Miss Robertson travelled to the Grand Hyatt, a 20-minute drive from the city’s international airport. But Miss Robertson apparently did not use her room. They met at a hotel and spent a passionate night together, this time practising safe sex.

More on the story after the jump.

‘Lisa was completely smitten by him,’ said a friend. ‘She just hoped that the relationship could continue on from there but perhaps she was hoping for too much.’

She was. Because she mentioned to the Daily Mail that she hasn’t heard from him since! HAH! Walk of shame down a moving sidewalk! Walk of shame down a runway tarmac! Ralph Fiennes has to bang flight attendants? I mean, he’s not Ryan Phillipe but he’s got some Hollywood cache. Use it, my man! Get some Maxim-level ass!

By J. Harvey
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Comments (11)

  1. Loob | February 16, 2007 at 10:09 am

    AAHAAHAA! Ow. Okay J.harvey, you have started causing me mild pain. Cease the hilarity, or I shall need painkillers. Never mind, do your worst.

  2. Tine | February 16, 2007 at 10:32 am

    That girl looks like Jay Leno.

  3. kikistar | February 16, 2007 at 10:48 am

    This affair proves us he’s not gay. JUST KIDDING!
    Seriously he could have done WAY much better but eh, he must have big and urgent needs…

  4. goil | February 16, 2007 at 11:08 am

    “long time girlfriend Sirin Lewenden has ended her five-month relationship” Since when is five months a long time? Well, I suppose if you’re dating a pig….

  5. Paige | February 16, 2007 at 11:13 am

    OMG! How old is that picture?! Those bangs are circa 1983.

    And that is one warthog of a stewardess to be losing your girlfriend over. He’s fug too though.

  6. IHartRafe | February 16, 2007 at 2:30 pm

    Uh, HELLO!?!?!? I’d fork Voldemort!

    Everyone likes something different but, in my opinion, Ralph Feinnes is FARGIN HAWT HAWT HAWT!!!

    Who cares about some chick he’s be bangin for a couple of months, she’ll be replaced in a matter of days…BUT what i do care about is that cannot be the woman he cheated with…i’ve seen better looking women working at Wal-Mart!

  7. Tonysgirl | February 16, 2007 at 4:05 pm

    Did he forget his medication that day???
    She looks like a man in drag…..lol

  8. TinaLou | February 16, 2007 at 4:31 pm

    Tonys Girl…NO KIDDING!!!

    There is no way in hell THAT got tapped by Mr. Fine!

    She’s a bow’za!

  9. Juju | February 16, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    “Sirin Lewenden has ended her five-month relationship with him because of his wandering eyes and hips.”
    Well, du-uh! How did she get him in the first place?! He cheated on Francesca Annis! He’s just another whore.

  10. Geebz | February 19, 2007 at 10:17 am

    I’m gonna have to start flying Qantas (sp) so I can get a quality pounding in the chemical toilet. May be nasty but it is Ralph and he IS fine!

  11. Susan | February 13, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    I have to admit I’m disappointed. Have some class for God’s sake. Both of them. Couple of mindless, horny jack-rabbits.

    I used to think Fiennes was extremely hot/attractive what-not, but I would never have slept with him. Buggering in the toilet just isn’t my cup of tea, or any kind of one night stand for that matter. Whether she was attractive or not isn’t the point -she was an easy mark. Although her accusation of Fiennes using her is ridiculous seeing as she was initially the seducer.

    How this guy is friends with Liam Neeson, I have no idea–Liam has some character at least.

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