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If I look down, people will still believe we are not a couple.

Renee Zellweger hides under her hoodie and behind her sunglasses yesterday as she and boyfriend Bradley Cooper walk to the car looking like it’s the next morning ride home of shame.  All she’s missing is plastic back with last nights tube dress in it. In reality the two just checked out the new three bedroom home Cooper purchased in the Pacific Palisades. 

Later that day the two “wised up” and left the House Ear Institute separately.  I had to look that up, because I was imagining a giant wax house shaped like an ear. It’s a non-profit research and education institute dedicated to “hearing science.”  Random, I wonder what they were doing there. 

Seriously, what’s the point of leaving separately? You two have made out in a church, she’s gotten chummy with your mom, and you’ve traveled together. Why not just enjoy your relationship? It’s not like every step you take, every move you make, we’ll be watching you….oh wait.