They’re So Not Getting Married

October 2nd, 2007 // 4 Comments

Don’t they look almost…cute here? I think the red is working for them. I can’t believe I just said something positive about Twig Satan and her band geek. I need to stop sipping on the hooch when I’m blogging. Word is that Nicole Richie and Joel Madden AREN’T getting married anytime soon. In face, they supposedly don’t plan on getting married until his shitty band is done touring. Let’s face it – this chief is a sperm donor, plain and simple. She glided over the jail sentence and it was too late to have it scraped. So she’s stringing his ass along to see exactly how much money the band has made him, and then she’s going to text his ass a break-up. Happens all the time. I know I sound brutal, but this cheddarhead was driving the wrong way down the freeway doped out of her mind and did 82 minutes in jail despite a prior conviction. Screw her!

Despite reports that Nicole Richie and Joel Madden are getting married October 13, a source tells Usmagazine.com that the couple is not planning on tying the knot until after their child is born this winter. In fact, the Good Charlotte frontman is going to be on tour when the alleged wedding was reported to be taking place. “It’s such a joke,” a Madden source tells Us. “We were all laughing about it. The tour is still on and they have no marriage plans yet.”

Indeed, wedding planner Lorraine Keseloff confirms that reports that she’s handling the Richie/Madden nuptials are totally inaccurate. In fact, she’s never even metthe parents-to-be! “I have no idea how this all got started,” Keseloff tells Usmagazine.com. “It’s been the most bizarre weekend. It’s all completely false.”

They neglected to include the part where Ms. Keseloff was like “I wouldn’t let that silly trash in the studio, are you crazy? I would like an exclusive clientele in the future, thanks. Maybe you’d like me to open a wedding planning business down at the trailer park? Perhaps I could get a standing invite to hold receptions at the Knights of Columbus in Kalamazoo? Perhaps we could hang some paper mache dolphins around the place and have a cold cut buffet for my next wedding. Huh? Dumbass!”

(Flynet)

By J. Harvey
Nicole Richie and Joel Madden sunglasses hairstyle top knot Oscars ...
Nicole Richie & Joel Madden Wedding PHOTOS | Bumpshack.com
Joel Madden Denies Marriage With Nicole Richie!
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Joel Madden & His Beautiful Ballerina
Joel Madden and his beautiful daughter Harlow ... wasn't with them – he was probably getting some alone time with mom Nicole Richie. The 32-year-old rocker dad and his twin brother Benji recently announced they’re forming a new band ...
Fashion Star Cast: Nicole Richie
Richie also spends much of her time working with The Richie-Madden Children’s Foundation (RMCF).  Launched in December 2007 in honor of the birth of Harlow, Nicole Richie and Joel Madden's daughter, RMCF provides meaningful opportunities to children ...

Comments (4)

  1. Phil | October 2, 2007 at 5:07 pm

    No, they don’t almost look cute. He looks like a douchebag and she looks like a starving Ethiopian. You know the ones who are so malnourished that their stomachs stick out.

  2. green cardigan | October 2, 2007 at 6:09 pm

    ah, no, ‘cute’ is stretching it slightly.

    Helloooooooo, is it me you’re looking for?

    Ah, whats with the sunglasses when there is no sunshine out spanners?

  3. please | October 2, 2007 at 7:54 pm

    Tour? Did he say “tour”? Who the heck wants to see him or even claim they know the trash he passes off as music.

    Tour… ::giggle::

  4. emma | October 3, 2007 at 6:06 am

    Thanks god someone else get what she did everybody is like thats not that bad or she is pregnant she shouldnt go to jail. she is so stupid.

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