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Matthew McConaughey refused to let being blackmailed into having sex when he was 15 and drugged and molested by a man when he was 18 โbeat himโ.
The โDallas Buyers Clubโ star previously shared the harrowing accounts in his autobiography, โGreenlightsโ, and heโs detailed the conversations he had with his father that informed him that this was not how anyone should be treated.
Speaking on Amanda de Cadenetโs โThe Conversation: About the Menโ podcast, he said of his parentsโ lessons on sexual intimacy and respect:
โWell, I had been taught, been guided by my parents about respect for a woman, respect for the relationship, respect for sexual intimacy, respect for space.
โMy dad had always had this thing when he taught us the birds and the bees, he sat me down talking the birds and the bees, he said, โYouโre getting that age you kiss?โ and I said, โYes, sir.โ And he goes, โWell, itโs gonna go further than that one day. Itโs probably gonna go to where youโre gonna get intimate and thereโs gonna be the breast, and thereโs gonna be below the belt.โ Iโm paraphrasing, and he goes, โItโs gonna happen to you as well.'โ
Recalling being taught about sexual consent, he continued: โAnd so he goes, and heโs talking to me, he says, โSon, as a male in the situation,โ speaking to me about a heterosexual relationship, โIf you ever feel the girl, the female, hesitate, stop.โ He even said this, he goes, โYou may even feel them hesitate, and then after you stop, they may go, oh, no, no, come on. Donโt. Wait till next time.โ And he was right, I got in certain senses where it was like, โNo, no, no. OK, Iโm out.โ And saying, โOK, cool. Iโm out.โ The girl went, โOh, well, no, come on.โ And I was like, โNo, no, no.โ He said, โTrust youโll have another day, if it is to be.'โ
The 52-year-old actor was still able to have some โhealthy sexual relationsโ with girls that werenโt โuglyโ after the blackmailing.
He went on: โBut I was very clear, again, that was not right, that was not cool, that was not the way it is.
โAfter that, I got to have some healthy sexual relations and have girls that I liked and liked me, and we slowly got intimate and it was beautiful and clumsy, and all those things, but it wasnโt ugly like that was.โ
When he was molested a few years later, he โdidnโt connectโ the two experiences.
The โGoldโ star hasnโt had therapy but says the people around him have helped him deal with the trauma.
Matthew vowed to himself to never let the abuse he experienced in his adolescence make him โafraid of relationshipsโ or stop him from trusting others.
He said: โIโm not gonna be afraid of relationships because my first experience was blackmail. Uh uh. Thatโs an aberration. No, no. Thatโs not the way it is. And if I go on โ and Iโm not gonna let it beat me. Iโm going, โIโm not gonna let that beat my sense of trust in people and say, โNo, I can have a healthy relationship.โ Non-negotiable. No.โ
He added: โHappened. Am I denying that it happened? No. Iโm not denying that it happened. Ugly. Ugh. I still get, even telling you this story, I get โ but am I gonna carry that? I chose, non-negotiably, Iโm not going to carry that, bring that baggage into the life Iโm going to lead, and how I treat people and how I trust people, and how I look at circumstances and the risk I may take.โ