After the season premiere last week, Soju was sent home after an unfortunate design challenge.
Any episode that involves costume construction quickly highlights the queens who might face a tough battle going forward – and acting challenges are also an easy way for Ru to separate the wheat from the chaff.
There’s a lot packed into this movie-themed episode, so grab your popcorn let’s get into it.
After the elimination, the queens come into the work room to find Soju’s lipstick messages wishing all of her “cysters” well. Is this Soju’s legacy? Talk about going viral. Sorry. Here last year’s viral sensation, Miss Vanjie, said she didn’t care of the cyst was inflamed to the size of “Guantamano Bay”, there are just some things that should be kept to one’s self and away from Mama Ru’s ears. I agree.
While Brooke Lynn is ecstatic to have won, Scarlet is disappointed she didn’t get the victory. Brooke Lynn thinks Ms. Envy is “delusional” and points out the many holes in her runway dress. Scarlet is out for blood and shares these words of wisdom about her competitor:
The next day in the work room, the queens kill time playing “Bang, Marry, Kill” and the only thing you need to know is that pretty much everyone wants to kill Silky. Ru enters, looking dapper in a navy suit and tells the queens that this week’s mini challenge is the return of the celebrity photobomb challenge from season 10. Remember that?
After 15 minutes getting into quick drag, the competition begins. Nina flashes Cardi B on the red carpet, Plastique gives us “shook” behind a selfie-taking Amber Rose, Scarlet crashes Harry and Megan’s wedding and then things go off the rails. Silky is photobombing Tom Brady, so she takes off all of her clothes and is working hard to grab every last one of her moments on this show. She really gives a new meaning to “naked ambition.” Shuga joins Céline Dion on stage. When Ru asks her what her favorite song is she replies, “My Heart Will Go On”, to which Ru replies, “How boring!” We all know what the best Céline song is. Ahem.
Yvie is giving us “crack whore realness” popping up behind a Simple Life-era shot of Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton. The other queens go by in a blur – and whoever picked out the final photos did some of the queens quite a disservice. (they chose some awful pics). But then there’s Brooke Lynn, our lone Canadian, who poses in front of the White House, showing the proper amount of respect due to the baby man running our country. Her legs are spread wide with a sign saying “Welcome to America” placed strategically in front of her crotch. Brava.
The winners of the challenge are Brooke Lynn (not a surprise) and Silky (I guess she deserved it). Their “prize” is to be the team leaders for the maxi challenge, where the queens celebrate black history by putting their spin on Black Panther (“Why’s It Gotta Be Black…Panther”) and Get Out (“Good God Girl, Get Out”). The teams are picked as follows:
Team Brooke Lynn: Nina, Ra’jah, Honey, Shuga, Plastique, Ariel
Team Silky: A’keria, Vanjie, Mercedes, Yvie, Kahanna, Scarlet
Scarlet was the last picked. Vanjie pointed out that she was “pressed like a panini” about this turn of events. Scarlet says she’s “Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.” Let’s see about that.
The teams get to work with casting and reading their scripts. Brooke asks Plastique if she can play her part of “Nails” as a Vietnamese nail tech. Silky gives the starring role in her film to Scarlet, who suspects she may be trying to sabotage her, but also thinks the starring role is where she belongs. Conversely, Kahanna is concerned because she only has two lines. Vanjie is confused, comparing the script to “the DaVinci code”. She is ruling the confessionals so far this season.
Ru checks in with the teams and Brooke’s team share the consensus that Silky is “problematic” because of her big, loud personality. Brooke told Ru about the shenanigans between Silky and Miley Cyrus the week before and said she was just “a lot.” Ru visits Team Silky and tells them what Team Brooke had to say and that she sucked the air out of the room. Silky surprises everyone by saying she has a master’s in organizational leadership and applied for a PhD program in global leadership. (#FunFact) Ru reminds Silky to let her cast mates get a word in edgewise…or not. Dr. Silky is out to prove Team Brooke wrong and says she’s glad she picked the team she did.
The teams arrive on set and shoot the movie with “directors” Ross and Michelle. Team Brooke is up first. My poor poutine Brooke has a lot of problems with the line “Beyoncé, what?” This isn’t looking good, as she’s the star of this whole thing. Shuga takes Ross’ direction about delivering lines after taking a hit off of a ridiculously huge joint. Ariel can’t stop saying “girl”. Plastique, who says she has no acting experience, cracks up Ross and Michelle. Ra’jah has a lot of trouble saying one line and looks stressed. Brooke is truly terrible – and she doesn’t feel confident about her team’s performance.
Team Silky is up next. Yvie is delightfully over the top. Vanjie can’t do a “dorky dad” character. She can’t stop being Vanjie. (Not that this is a bad thing.) Mercedes can’t get her mouth around the word “opulence” and Kahanna looks like a “flapping duck.” Of course, no one comes off worse than Dr. Silky, who has a lot of trouble delivering her final monologue and can’t stop laughing after A’keria tries to taze her. Scarlet says she’s glad her character is supposed to be “concerned and confused”, as that what she is at the moment. At this point, it’s hard to say which team will emerge victorious.
On elimination day, while the queens were getting ready, Yvie got out her spoon and started stirring things up, asking Silky how she felt about what Ru told her the day before. She wanted whoever said it to Ru come forward. Ariel ‘fessed up and was the only one to admit it, which chuffed her a little bit. Yvie then got into it with Ra’jah, criticizing her and her makeup. Ra’jah came back and said that Yvie’s makeup looked like she applied it with her feet. Meow. The talk moved on to pageants and Mercedes revealed that she was on the No Fly List for a few years because of her name, which “sounds Muslim.” She said in the confessionals “I’m a drag queen. What do you think I’m going to do?” The pressure had an adverse reaction on her health, as she shares in the clip below:
On the runway, Ru pays tribute to Black Panther with a stunning African print gown and greets this week’s judges. Sydelle Noel, who starred in Black Panther and plays Cherry Bang on GLOW looks amazeballs and, if you ever watched Saturday Night Live and thought it would be hilarious to have Drunk Uncle on the judging panel, you’re in luck as Bobby Moynihan is here. It does make sense, as Bobby was featured in a hilarious Drag Race-inspired sketch on SNL last season (with bonus Chris Pine.) Bobby said his drag name would be “Fatti LuPone” or “Better Midler”. He also shared this on Twitter:
This week, the category is “What’s Your Sign?” and the queens gave us their best zodiac-inspired lewks.
Brooke Lynn (Pisces), gave us a koi pond fantasy.
Plastique (Aries) wore another leotard-based look, one that Bobby aptly described as the “hostess at every restaurant in Game of Thrones.
Ra’jah (Capricorn) donned horns made of hair horns and a beaded gown that Ru joked came from the collection of “Jean Paul Goat-ier.”
Nina (Leo) featured a gown that prompted Ru to declare, “her fire is on pussy.”
Honey (Leo) described her regal couture as “if Diana Ross was the lion in The Wiz.”
Shuga (Scorpio) said her look was “dark, mysterious and scary” and Michelle said she was reminded of 90s singer Jane Child (who I adored – remember “Don’t Wanna Fall in Love”?)
Ariel (Aries) was enveloped in purple fur and had horns for days, which inspired Ru to say, “Ewe better work.”
Silky (Capricorn) she…umm…I am getting the impression that this challenge is just “wear your best dress and put some horns on your head.”
Yvie (Leo) got a Cats joke from Michelle, who called her “Rum Tum Tugger, the early years” and described her droid-like lion-bot as a “digital fantasy.”
Vanessa (Libra) was in bloom, wearing a red floral gown with rose covered floral scales.
A’Keria (Pisces) was embodying “fish” with an ocean-inspired gown.
Mercedes (Sagittarius), was ready to shoot that poison arrow into our hearts.
Kahanna (Aries) was a vision in yellow hues with enormous horns, a look Ru deemed “Ram tough.”
Scarlet (Pisces) gave us a look that prompted Bobby to say, “I don’t remember Frozen being like this.” She was an ice queen with a fish fin faux hawk and bubble guns.
With all of this glam on the runway, I almost forgot about the movies. In retrospect, it might have been better if we all did. Team Brooke’s Black Panther parody was painful (who writes this stuff?) Brooke was definitely the weakest link, but Nina (who we hardly saw during the shoot), Plastique and were hilarious. Team Silky’s Get Out take-off was next (featuring a cameo from Derrick Barry!) Scarlet and Yvie were the standouts and, not surprisingly, Mercedes and Kahanna struggled. A’Keria, who we also didn’t see much of during the shoot, was also great.
Ru makes her decision. There’s no team winner and Nina, Vanjie, Silky, Honey, A’Keria and Ra’jah are declared safe. Sydelle loved Brooke’s runway look but Michelle called her performance in the challenge “one note.” Michelle clocked Plastique for wearing the same boots for the challenge and the runway, but Bobby said she was a “standout” in the video and Sydelle called her a “scene stealer.” Michelle said Shuga looked stunning but that there was “no Scorpio” in her look. Ariel was criticized for being “in her head” and “clunky” in the team’s movie. Scarlet’s look and performance were lauded, with Ross telling her that he liked the “peaks and valleys” in performance. (Sydelle later called her “a leading lady”, so Scarlet wasn’t lying earlier about her performing prowess.)
Yvie was complemented on her “superb” performance and her chemistry with Scarlet as well as her “weird and fierce” runway. Mercedes was told that in the film, she fell flat and got lost. Upon hearing these comments, Mercedes teared up and admitted to her “stroke” (at least it’s better than a cyst.) Kahanna’s performance in the video also failed to impress, with Ross telling her that he could see that she was trying hard but that she “didn’t get all the way there.” Ru felt her not working out a routine with Mercedes was a “missed opportunity.”
After the judges’ deliberations, Scarlet and Yvie ae both deemed winners. Mercedes and Kahanna (for the second time) are forced to lip sync for their lives. This week’s song is “Work Bitch” by Britney Spears. Since I can only assume that this is a drag queen staple, the queens probably already knew the words by hearty and could concentrate on their moves – and they sure did. Kahanna delivered some great flips and Mercedes executed a split that left Bobby slack-jawed.
Sadly, it was only two strikes that sent Kahanna packing and Coco’s daughter is sashaying her way back to Sin City (and I will be seeing you in April!) On Untucked, Ra’jah and Yvie buried the hatchet and Bobby went backstage to kiki with the queens, don a pair of heels and perform a “safety first” death drop (I can sometimes take or leave Untucked, but Bobby’s appearance makes this episode a must-see.) The lucky 13 queens will be back to take on another challenge next week, and I’ll be here to spill the tea. Until then, everybody say LOVE!