Itโs the semi-finalsโฆfinally! If you even remotely pay attention to RuPaulโs Drag Race on the internet, you probably already know who the top four are, so this episode kind of feels like filler. Itโs been a long season and Iโm ready for the finale. I think the better way to experience this episode is to make it a drinking game and drink every time you hear Yvieโs infectious laugh. Just a suggestion.
After the lip sync that launched a thousand โmehsโ, everyone is bummed that Nina is gone and Silky is understandably shook, but still blames Brooke Lynn setting her up with Soju in the makeover challenge. Aโkeria points out that the two queens who were called out in front of the judges as the ones who should go home are still there. Yvie says sheโs proud of what sheโs done and what she represents in the top five.
Everyone who didnโt lip sync is surprised that Silky and Nina werenโt both sent packing. Brooke said she was โunderwhelmedโ with Silkyโs performance, especially after she kept talking smack about how she wanted to lip sync for her life, a sentiment echoed by Aโkeria. Silky says she was reminded that the โgreatest gift from Godโ was forgiveness and said sheโd like to get to know Yvie after the competition and the two made up. Aww. And as a parting shot before the credits, if you didnโt think Silkyโs lip sync wasnโt enough of a hot mess, she also broke the heels of her boots while she was performing. Yikes.
Itโs a new day in the work room and Michelle greets the queens to tell them about their last challenge. Aโkeria says she doesnโt look as mean when sheโs not at the judgesโ table, and I agree. Michelle and I are the same age and I am jealous of how great she looks. You go, girl. But I digress. For the final maxi challenge, the queens have to record a rap verse for Ruโs new dance track, โQueens Everywhereโ and take on the โmost ambitious choreography of the season.โ With the exception of Brooke, this has not been the season for dancing queens, so I sense danger. At least we have Todrick Hall here to coach the ladies, not the sassy Yanis Marshall from the โTrump: The Rusicalโ challenge. The queens will also sit down with Ru and Michelle for an episode of their โWhatโs the Tee?โ podcast. Michelle helpfully points out that the show has provided padding to help the gals with their looksโฆand we all know exactly who this was directed at.
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The queens get to work on their lyrics for their verse in the song. Aโkeria says they were asked to write eight bars, but she has two pages (and no idea what eight bars is.) Yvie says that rap is โthe art of telling your truthโ, adding that โyou have to be confidentโ about it. Vanjie says she pretty much raps every day her own hype man with some Dirty South flavor and wants to inject a little ballroom into her lyrics. She feels confident and is excited about the challenge. Silky admits sheโs never rapped before (much to Vanjieโs surprise) but wants to pay tribute to the big girls with her lyrics. Brooke says her verse is a tribute to Canada because she wants to represent her country. Yvie jokingly asks if sheโs going to sing โO Canadaโ and points out that Brookeโs so excited about the challenge that sheโs either got a strong game face or is completely delusional.ย Silky is still on her โBrooke is shadyโ tour. Let it go, girl. Vanjie says she knows she has to โslay this challenge.โ
Vanjie is the first to record her verse and meets with Todrick, who is rocking a hairdo that is making me crave a black and white cookie from the Publix bakery right now, and Ruโs producer for the track, Markaholic (which Iโm assuming is a stage name.) Vanjieโs first attempt fails to impress Todrick, who points out that โโspinโ and โbitchโ donโt rhymeโ, to which Vanjie snaps back with, โNicki Minaj gets away with it, why canโt I?โ She then records some ad libs and seems to feel like she killed it, noting, โSo far, so good, so hood.โ Meanwhile, Aโkeria chats with Ru and Michelle on the โpodcastโ. I occasionally listen to โWhatโs the Teeโ and I would love to think that Ru records every episode in drag โ and thatโs how I picture her when I listen. During the interview, it is revealed that Aโkeria is raising her brotherโs two-year-old child, due to some โlegal issuesโ. This revelation makes me like her even more.
Yvie heads to record her verse and says that when she was in trouble as a kid, which happened a lot, she would write โangry little rapsโ about her chores. Todrick loves what she wrote but fears sheโs going to have a problem getting all of the words out and still be able to breathe. Todrick wants her to dip into her creepy side and add some mystery to her delivery and Yvie obliges. Todrick seems happy with the results. Silky heads over to chat with Ru and Michelle. She says she started drag in college, she went to an all-male school in Indiana and was asked to represent her school for some sort of drag show. Michelle asked about Silkyโs educational background, as, as we know, sheโs got a BA (in something) as well as an MA in organizational leadership, which she says has not helped her out when dealing with the other queens in the work room. She goes on to say that the other girls didnโt like her because sheโs loud and talks too much and pointed out that just last week, some were surprised that she was still in the competition, but, since sheโs on her forgiveness kick, all is well.ย
Brooke is now in the studio with Todrick and sheโsโฆummโฆenthusiasticโฆ? Sheโs never rapped before but sheโs giving us the two fingers โ even though she has no idea what that means โ and has decided her rapper name is going to be โFeminem.โ Okay, thatโs clever.
Yvie joins Ru and Michelle for a chat. When Ru asked if she was surprised to still be in the running, Yvie said sheโs dealt with the negative voices in her head but, in the end, thinks that she knows she deserves to be there. When Ru brought up the other girls saying she should go home last week, Yvie said that based on judgesโ critiques, it was a โfair pointโ, but said some girls were holding a grudge about something she said and that it โhindered any friendships.โ Michelle offered her this sage advice, โAllow yourself to be a little more open to other people.โ She added, โIf you let them in, theyโre going to love you for who you are.โ
Silky works on her verse with Todrick. She tells him she wants to represent the big girls and then gets hilariously tongue-tied while spitting out her lyrics. She gives it another go and impresses Todrick with her โemotion and swagโ but points out that she needs to annunciate her words. When she paid attention to the words, she was โmore accurate and less funโ and Todrick told her to find a happy medium.ย
Itโs Brookeโs turn to chat with Ru and Michelle and Ru immediately asks about Branjie. Brooke says she has hooked up with her fellow queens before (โnothing seriousโ) but has never had a boyfriend. WHAT? Michelle gives him the slightest hint of a side eye at that response. Same, girl, same. Brooke said she felt confident coming into the competition, but since itโs not all about looks, admits sheโs felt stupid and fallen on her face, but is learning to let the fear surrounding that go. He said that in the ballet and pageant worlds, there wasnโt room for โartistic interprement.โ Thatโs cuter than โFeminem.โ I love me some Brooke.
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Aโkeria is last in the studio and she has some dope lyrics, but as Todrick noted was serving them like she was โdelivering an Easter speech at church.โ Todrick offers her some good advice, but Aโkeria doesnโt look too confident. Vanjie is last to chat with Ru and Michelle. Before being โblessedโ with a second chance at drag superstardom, she was working at a makeup counter in Tampa. She is from Florida by way of Puerto Rico and picked up her accent from her (gorgeous) mom. Ru (of course) also asked her about Branjie and she said sheโs open to dating after the show (hoping Brooke said the same thing or โIโm gonna whoop her ass.โ) Vanjie said sheโs grown during her experience โwell-roundedlyโฆand all that jazzโฆโ I am going to miss my weekly dose of Vanjieโs confessionals.
The queens all head to the stage to work on their choreography and Vanjie is wearing a hat that looks like itโs decorated with bits of the outfit that got her eliminated last season. The dance lessons start and thereโs a lot of tentative moves and missteps. Aโkeria is definitely not in her element, asserting that she is not a dancer. Todrick works with the queens one-on-one and, while Vanjie looks like sheโs picked up the moves, her eyes are downcast. Todrick tells her to look out at the crowd like Beyoncรฉ would. Brooke moves beautifully but is definitely bringing more ballet than hip hop. As she put it, she was giving โJulia Stiles in Save the Last Danceโ and promises Todrick that she will โput some stank on it.โ ย Yvie and Silky are next, and you can see how they fared in this clip:
Aโkeria is up last and you can tell sheโs having a really hard time. Todrick says she needs to get out of her hear and work harder than the other girls, telling her, โEven if itโs wrong, just try to hit something.โ Thatโs my life motto. Todrick then lays another surprise on the queens. They are going to do this lip syncing, dancing extravaganza in a one-take video (a la โKitty Girlโ from AS3.) The queens all look terrified and I am scared for them.
The queens come into the work room on elimination day and are greeted with cocktails from famed bar Mickyโs in WEHO. Yvie says the drink โtastes like West Hollywoodโ and now I have to know what that tastes like. Silky says sheโs loud and overbearing at tines but thanks the queens for accepting her for who she is. Yvie also thanks the queens for accepting her โgritty and nittyโ (whatever that is). The queens recall their most memorable moments of the season. Aโkeriaโs was the L.A.D.P. challenge, Silkyโs was playing Oprah in โTrump: The Rusicalโ and Yvieโs was the farm to runway challenge. Of course, they all won these challenges, which sent Vanjie off on a โtortoise and hareโ rant, ending with โdonโt sleep on the turtles! Sometimes the turtles win the race.โ And, of course, we talk Branjie, which goes a little something like thisโฆ
Itโs time for the last runway of the season. Ru is serving us Glenda the Good Witch realness. Violet is definitely her color and I live for this wig. This week is โjust familyโ on the judgesโ panel โ with the return of Carson Kressley. Ru debuts the โQueens Everywhereโ video andโฆitโs good. Aโkeria surprisingly kills it, as does Silky (despite giving us all a look at whatโs going on under her skirt.) Yvie is definitely MVP, doing a really impressive backbend walk. Brooke and Vanjie, while doing well with the moves, just are kind of flat. It was no โKitty Girlโ, but it was entertaining, Check it out for yourself:
On the runway, category is โBest Drag.โ Brooke Lynn goes full ballerina, on pointe, in a bedazzled white tutu. Silky looks the best he has all season in a nude illusion beaded gown and a wig she could have mopped from Aโkeria. She finally is wearing a corset, and it makes such a difference. Vanjie is serving โVivien Leigh in Gone with the Wind, Latina styleโ in a full-length green brocade gown. Itโs a lovely gown, but is it really โbest dragโ? Yvie comes out in a ruby gown and, keeping with her brand, has three eyes, three boobs, three fingers on each hand and three cheeks. I kind of love this look. Aโkeria wins in my book with a stunning beaded gown, complete with a bugle beaded fringed skirt. Gorge.
The judges love Aโkeriaโs runway look. As for the video, Todrick said he was worried before he saw it, but said she was in it. Michelle also complemented her performance. Carson said he loved how she experienced growth from challenge to challenge. Todrick loved Brooke Lynnโs look, saying it reminded him of Sahara Davenport. Carson also liked it but wasnโt sure it was the best representation of her. Michelle said that although she had the moves down pat, something was missing from her performance in the video. Ross missed the โpassionโ and Carson wanted more โsass.โ Silky said it took three people to get her into her gown. Todrick said he loved working with her and thought she did a great job. Ross said her performance was filled with โpassion and fun.โ Michelle said she needs to think about being as pulled together as she can be. Carson told Vanjie he appreciated seeing her other, glamorous side but Ross said he was bummed that she didnโt kill it in the video. Michelle also called her out for โbarelyโ lip syncing. Ru told Yvie she never looked more beautiful. Carson loved the combination of beauty and camp and said it was his favorite look of the night. Michelle said her performance was remarkable and Todrick said her lyrics were so strong that they created choreography specifically for them. ย
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Ru told the queens she was proud of each of them and then, as itโs a tradition on the second-to-last episode of Drag Race, they had to offer words of advice to their younger selves. Aโkeria told her 10-year-old self to be true to himself and love who he was, even though it wasnโt always going to be easy. Brooke told her two-year-old self that he is perfect and wonderful just the way he isโฆand to stop dyeing his hair so much and over-tweezing his eyebrows. Silky told his six-year-old self to let the world see his truth and live the life he wanted to live. Vanjie told his six-year-old self that while he might feel misunderstood, it gets better. Yvie told his four-year-old self to not to build walls and keep being himself.
After more discussion among the judges, Ru tells Yvie that she is the winner of the challenge. Also in the top four are Aโkeria and Silky. This, of course, will break up Branjie. Brooke and Vanjie are lip syncing for their lives to Aretha Franklinโs โPride: A Deeper Love.โ It didnโt reach the levels of Brooke and Yvieโs epic lip sync (but what could?) but it was pretty great. Brooke did it all en pointe, which ever fails to impress me and she was delivering a passionate performance. Vanjie was also good, but it seemed like she wasnโt all there. Ru agreed, sending Vanjie off to All-Stars 4 (you know this is happening), but not before Vanjie leaves the runway more memorably than she did last time. Next week, THE FINALE! See you then!